Auto Lovers

Auto Lovers

Who are these people? What are they thinking? Don’t they have anything better to do with their money? These gussied-up vehicles are the street equivalent of the drag queen — as impressive as the accoutrements are, it’s obvious that underneath everything is something not intended to be dressed that way. Worse, their “improvements” — ultra-dark tinted windows, leetle Matchbox wheels, ground-hugging aero-skirts — are the kind that make their already inferior vehicles more difficult to control. I remember the time that jet-black low-slung Mustang lost a couple thousand dollars of fiberglass on the neighborhood speed bump. I had to hug a tree to keep from falling down. Fortunately, Mr. Bad Ass was too busy screaming into his cell phone to notice me.

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