by Ken Smith
Now I’m not doubting for one minute that you’ve got it bad. I believe everything you tell me. You’re an honest guy, right? But let me tell you, sweetie, things can be far FAR worse.
Why anybody would even PUT SOMETHING LIKE THIS TOGETHER is beyond me. Chapter one sets the brutal tone, and it never improves from there. Chapter one, in case you were wondering, details the hideous fate of a certain African, Ota Benga, who determined that he better get the hell outta there before his neighbor tribesfolk ate him. Unfortunately, he got mixed up with a white guy who really didn’t have his best interests at heart. Ota arrived on our fatal shore in 1904 and things just sorta went downhill from there. The chapter details all sorts of undeserved misfortunes, including a protracted stint in the MONKEY CAGE at a New York ZOO, before the guy finally says, “The hell with it,” and shoots himself in the HEART.
Each chapter is another installment in the ongoing litany of undeserved woe and sorrow, with a new antiprotagonist as the focus for each chapter.
Forget the rewards of hard work, good karma, and all the rest of it, folks. Dumb luck reigns supreme. And luck, as we all know, comes in two flavors. Good and BAD.