Here Comes The Uh-Oh – June 1st, 2000

by Bing Futch

My will to live is stronger than my need to say goodbye to the uninspired details of my complicated life. I’m amazed and I’m surrounded, I’m aghast at what I find. But I steel myself and carry on with a deadly one-track mind. Tend to speak ever so softly, but I scream every chance that I get, find myself remembering yesterdays when I haven’t found the future yet. I recognize my strengths and weaknesses and I recognize the need for love, oh sweet love. I live downstairs between a rock and a hard place now, but that’s what I get for marryin’ the musik.

I’ve got this “yo-ho, yo-ho” thing going on in my head right now. You know. The theme song from “Pirates Of The Carribean.” No-one is too cool to know that song. “We pillage and plunder/we rifle and loot/drink up, me ‘arties, yo-ho!” Neither is that other tune that’s now running around inside of my head. The one that the spooks sing in the Haunted Mansion. “Happy haunts etherealize/then begin to vocalize/grim grinning ghosts come to socialize.” It’s not that these catchy tunes are randomly bouncing around in my cavern of a brain–they’re blaring through my Cambridge Soundworks Maxi-Phat-Subwoofer-Cube system, at least my sad attempts at them. They’re from the soundtrack of a video series called “Disney Overload” that I produced between 1994-97 and unfortunately, all I got is cassette tape masters.

I know. Yuck.

But the original discs were compatible with the Korg O1w/fd that I hawked at a Cash America some time ago to pay the rent, so these will have to do. I’m cleaning them up with Sound Forge 4.5 (can I hear an “amen”?) and wondering how I ever managed to do without plug-ins. See, there’s a method to the madness, usually.

So, when you went to the “Get A Life” show in the past, you’d meet Melissa Foxx and Mimi Mouse (in da house!) downstairs for a bit of chat before heading up–but the GAL gals have gotten so busy with the gradual blowing up of the show, they actually have to employ assistants! Just so you know–this isn’t a corporate-owned program, even though it’s taking place in the studios of Clear Channel Communications. No sir and no ma’am, the duo gets their own sponsors and take up the slack out of pocket. That’s going whole brain for the cause of independents, a super big a-yi to them! They can be heard in a very limited pocket o’ space in the central Florida area on 740 AM WWNZ, Friday nights at 6pm. Show information, tidbits, bios and archives can be found at www.melissafoxx.com and www.m4radio.com!

In case you didn’t get it, the first paragraph is made up of lyrics to a song that never got recorded. The tune, “Marryin’ The Musik”, did end up as a hyperactive dance instrumental on my last CD “70mm” but the vocal version has never popped up again. It’s probably better, since I can’t sing, but even better still because that cynical, gritty, hard-edged person doesn’t exist anymore, so why bother carrying the viewpoints of the past around like holey underwear? If anything, that persistent “Wedding March” does all the talking in that tune, a harbinger of things to come……