Heavenly
Coming From the Sky
Noise
To say this sucks would be too easy; to actually take a minute to think of something more clever would be a minute absolutely wasted. Doubtless, Heavenly•s Coming From the Sky debut painfully displays how low and ridiculous the power-metal genre has sunk (I can•t stress this more) the past three years • yep, ever since Hammerfall “made it big” • sounding not so much like a Helloween cover band fumbling for their footing in the execution department as it does like one whose knees buckle while futilely stabbing for an identity, that of which being the way-beyond-obvious Helloween (any era • they•re all the same, really). As the story goes, Heavenly won a record contract through fans voting for MP3s by unidentified unsigned bands on Noise•s Web site, Heavenly•s digital offering presumably winning out, which isn•t much of a surprise considering Noise•s track record, not to mention their reinvigorated attempt to peddle such Euro-drek to our American ears again. Me, I•m staying way the hell away, hoping to any higher power willing to listen that I don•t have to review any more power-metal records in the coming year • I could then die a happy man.
Noise, 12358 Ventura Blvd., Suite 386, Studio City, CA 91604, http://www.us.noiserecords.com