Last Meal Review: Garza picks it.
by James MacLaren
Okey dokey, so now the feds are back in the execution business. First McVeigh,
and a week after that a certain Juan Raul Garza.
We already know more than enough about McVeigh, right?
Garza was a drug dealer who apparently watched a few too many episodes of Miami
Vice and decided a few times along the way that the answer to whatever conundrum
that was giving him fits was to just blow away whatever person who was causing
the conundrum in the first place.
No more person, no more conundrum. Easy, eh?
So it’s obvious that the guy hasn’t got all that much on the ball mentally to
begin with, right? Did Albert Einstein ever wonder if smuggling would be a
better career choice than relativity? Probably not. Obviously, Garza was no
So ok, lets get to the nub of the matter here, ok?
To wit: Garza’s last meal.
I’m still scratching my head over this one.
The first item on the menu is steak. No problems there. Everybody, except for
some weenie vegatarian, loves a good steak. And the murder of cattle is still
ok, here in the good old U. S. of A.
Item the second is onion rings. Not on the top of MY personal list of best
things I could ever eat in my life just prior to getting snuffed, but hey, it’s
not my decision.
Item the third is french fries. So ok, the guy’s a junk food junkie. And we’ve
already decided that he’s not Albert Einstein. I would have probably picked mashed
potatoes with gravy or something a little more substantial, but again, it’s not
Item the fourth, and last, is the one that’s driving me bats.
No, I am not making this up.
Does anybody in the entire world actually PREFER the taste of Diet Coke over
regular Coke? No way!
So what’s going on here, anyway? What the hell was Garza thinking when they
asked him what he wanted for his LAST meal?
“Hmm…well Warden, you guys are gonna kill me here in a couple of hours but
lookit this tummy of mine, wouldya? Whatta ya say we make it a DIET Coke, how
Did I mention that Garza was no Albert Einstein?