with American Party Machine
The Social; Orlando, FL • March 9, 2016
by Jared Campbell
Wednesday, March 9th 2016 was easy. All I needed was Black Sabbath and bad food. Doom rock and the dukes? Heavy Metal and ruptured gall bladders? No, Wednesday night was made for grease and cheese. I ordered the #2: The Mac Sabbath and American Party Machine combo at the Social in Orlando. American Party Machine was served as a hot appetizer.
“Here’s a song about getting high. Fuck you.” Mack Studly, of American Party Machine spit into the microphone as Swisher Sweets in his goddamned rolled up cutoff short shorts shredded riffs on his axe. Mr. Sweets and The Sesh flanked both sides of Studly atop their stage enhancing rock boxes like heydaying K.K. Downing and Glenn Tipton as Powerbomb thundered on the bass from behind his “I’m going to fuck your girlfriend and then write her a speeding ticket” cop sunglasses. George Moshington provided the drumbeat for the Social’s fully deserved American V8 butter chugging beat-down. American Party Machine was fully loaded and cranked to 11.
Party pumping members Pat Riot and Abro-Ham Drinkin’ provided fuckwad encouragement and Red-White-and Blue confetti rain as beach balls murdered the faces of fellow crowd members. This hot rodded band of flag waving rock gods blew their expectations all over our faces. Let me put it like this: American Party Machine stole the show. When they finished, I needed a drink and reason to stay for more. Good thing the headliners were on deck for the finishing move.
Mac Sabbath is a band that dresses up like demented McDonald’s characters and plays Black Sabbath songs with re-formatted lyrics about fast food. After the openers killed everyone in the room with their superb performance, Mac Sabbath put up a curtain to keep us from seeing what they were up to. This didn’t stop me from using technology to get an update of what was going on. I stuck my phone under the fabric and took a few pictures. While I did get a blurry shot of what I believed to be Ronald Osborne drinking whiskey with Slayer McCheese, I also got a most unfortunate upskirt pic of Grimalice. Upon trying to get subsequent pictures of Grimalice’s nuts, I found their stage hand trying to confiscate my phone. His greasy hand was no match to my nimble fingers, though. The phone and the pics are mine stage hand, so suck it.
The curtain dropped as War Pigs, excuse me, More Ribs, ground into our ears. It was evident that the drummer, Catburgler, along with Grimalice on bass, and Slayer McCheese on guitar were seasoned musicians. They played Black Sabbath songs note for note as though they were Black Sabbath. The curtain drop revealed Ronald Osborne kneeling in the corner wearing a straight jacket atop a souped up Ronald McDonald costume. He eventually rose to his feet and relocated to the mic stand that resembled a super sized Mickey D’s drink cup complete with straw.
Ronald’s stage area featured a smoke spewing barbecue which he would engage with what looked like a touch of a button. What he lacked in vocal ability he made up for with antics. He moved about the stage clapping and smiling like Ozzy while clown heads shot laser beams out of their freaking eyes from either side of the stage. It was mostly effective.
Grimalice and Slayer provided the power to Catburgler’s damn good drumming. He did Bill Ward proudly. For a “cover?” band they played these classic riffs pretty damn good.
For the rest of the set they repeated what seemed to be their basic formula: Play a cover of a Black Sabbath song while the singer yells reworked lyrics about fast food, claps, and then throw in the occasional mock vomiting into a bucket or pretending to eat well preserved chicken nuggets for a sparkle of enthusiasm. Ronald, at one point encouraged the crowd to pour drinks into a tube that he drank from as he laid on the floor. They were a spectacle. One that had every phone in the house out snapping pictures.
Mac Sabbath put on a very fun show. I recommend that you go see them perform, buy one of their many badass t-shirts, and join in the pouring of random drinks. (What could go wrong?) Keep your expectations where they should be – readied to be entertained.
And for the love of God and Country, go see American Party Machine!