• Check This Out, Too

    Column by Jessica Smith

  • My Angry Holiday

    “Ho ho ho! I just checked my list for an unprecedented THIRD time! You’ll all have to die! Mwuhooohahahahaha!”

  • Got Me An Asphalt Track Date…

    “I like sports. It’s not always the hippest admission in some circles, but I do like sports. But I know few people, while they may scorn baseball or football, whose eyes don’t light up at the mention of that finest of motorsports, Figure Eight School Bus Racing…”

  • 7even Inches

    Column by David Lee Beowülf

  • Adjective City|Beyond Salvation|Bio Ritmo|Birchville Cat Motel|T

    Column by David Lee Beowülf

  • Kissimmee, Land of Enchantment

    “Ask anyone outside of Florida to name Orlando’s landmarks and they are likely to reply with a litany of tourist attractions, most of which are not even in the same county. The real gateway to Vacationland Orlando is Kissimmee, once a quiet cattle ranching community in Osceola County, now a quiet cattle ranching community with a neon river called US 192 running through it…”

  • Angry At School

    “So my estranged lunatic ex-girlfriend, right on time with the first installment of her twice-weekly phone-stalking, calls me up to tell me about her recent experiences as a substitute teacher in the Bay area. She’s mostly been assigned to sub for high school classes, an experience that opened her eyes to the wonders of a liberally-bloated educational system…”

  • Bums

    “While I was going to try to resist the temptation to write about sports in this, a column about ephemeral Florida, but I was going to pass a glance at baseball’s spring training tradition. The emergence and growth of the Grapefruit Leagu parallels that of Florida tourism, even to the clustering around the superhighways and the tendency of slickness to replace the rustic and nostalgic…”

  • Burt Bacharach

    Column by David Lee Simmons

  • Angry At Life

    “Hating Life!”

  • Northbound on A1A With A Broken Heart & A Bad CV

    “There is an unnerving synchroncity to my beginning this, the first Unknown Florida column, on the day after the closing of Marineland. Dozens of tourist attractions have bitten the dust since Uncle Walt moved the heart of Florida tourism to I-4 and US 192, but this is the most significant death…”

  • The Pine Valley Cosmonauts

    Column by James Mann

  • Busy Girl

    Column by Jennifer Winston

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