A Triumph For The Reverend Jackson

by Shelton Hull

SATURDAY, MAY 1, 11:13 PM

Word has come in that the Rev. Jesse Jackson, famed civil-rights

leader and two-time presidential also-ran, has negotiated the release

of three American soldiers that had been in Serbian custody for a

month following the beginning of US, er, NATO bombings against

Serb targets in and around Kosovo on March 24. At this point, the

offensive has generated several billion dollars’ drain on our domestic

finances, killed a couple busloads of civilians, including those killed

when the Serbian TV station was destroyed last week, and deposited

a stray missle or two in Turkey and Montenegro.

The object of their affection is a Mr. Milosevic of Belgrade, a fanatical

dictator-raconteur who takes to ethnic cleansing with the audacity of

a Roman bathhouse. Having won convincingly in the Bosnian conflict

earlier this decade, the forces of peace and justice stepped in and

forced him to be nice to the families of everyone he killed. Milosevic

then turned to quashing the rebellion in Kosovo.

The ethnic Albanians who were the majority group in the region felt,

rightly, that life under his rule might be on the short side, and formed

the Kosovo Liberation Army.

Milosevic felt, rightly, that the KLA would not be sympathetic to his

need for absolute power, and set about destroying his competition in

the traditional Eastern European style.

The forces of peace and justice felt, rightly, that mass murder is not

very nice, and stepped in to resolve the situation, after granting

Milosevic sufficient time to kill everyone he really wanted to.

Now, after 40 days and 40 nights of remote-control warfare aimed,

allegedly, at only the most fundamental Serb military targets, the

clearest indication of their effect in weakening the enemy is that we’re

still bombing them. So they’re apparently not working, unless

Milosevic’s claim of adding 60,000 extra troops to the 40,000 already

in Kosovo is a sign of desperation.

Jackson had only been in the region for about three days, meeting

with the captured troops on Friday. He and Milosevic met on

Saturday and forged some sort of agreement in which the Serbs

allow the soldiers to return to America with Jackson – can’t wait for

that photo-op – without any concessions from us. Yet. The bombings

continue, but Jackson is said to be carrying a letter from Milosevic to

President Clinton, requesting a face-to-face meeting. He’s implying

that releasing the soldiers was an act of good will, and deserves

reciprocation. In other words, stop the bombing and give the Serbs

the same deal as in Dayton in 1995: they keep the land and turn over

a few military personnel for cockfighting at the Hague, and we get to

rave about the triumph of American diplomacy.

It’s fun to imagine how glorious such moments are for the thousands

of innocent people that have died in the region this decade. Or the

thousands of refugees that are going to find themselves at

Guantanamo Bay, sleeping in the former tents and cots of every

dispossessed islander that ever piled thirty friends into the roof of

their house and set sail for South Beach, if American Diplomacy

doesn’t do something quick.

Jackson’s feat is all the more startling in light of the Administration’s

diplomatic failures in l’affaire Kosovo. A man who has never held

elected office, who would be hosting his show on CNN if he wasn’t off

outperforming Albright and Cohen! Prior to the initiation of US, er,

NATO bombings, representatives of the opposing factions met in

Rambouille, France with US/NATO people in an effort to end the war.

Milosevic stepped up the fighting in the midst of negotiations. Clearly

he had everyone by the balls and was not adverse to twisting. And

now he’s taking photo ops with a black Baptist minister! Here you

see the power of celebrity: Mr. Jackson would be lying at the bottom

of a shallow grave if Milosevic didn’t recognize him from Saturday

Night Live. Jesse is a master at working the press, and no one’s

gotten such open capitulation from Serbia since Holbrooke. He might

be able to parlay this into a Nobel Peace Prize or a third Presidential

run, which would be cool. He’s always been a good guy for politics,

but it’s hard to find a good spot for him.