Archikulture Digest

48 Hour Yard Sale

48 Hour Yard Sale

Brian Feldman Productions

Private Residence, Orlando FL

Feb 3 through Feb 5, 2012</strong>

I’ve been to a yard sale or two in my career, although Mr. Feldman seems less familiar with the process and the rabid pickers that show up at 6 a.m. All morning long, minivans and pickup trucks cruised the street slowly, looking for the sale but we were holding out until noon. By 11:45, a row of trucks lined up, the pickers chatted, and I became nervous. We had a garage full of mystery boxes, Feldman was freaking out and somehow we had to deploy the remnants of his Florida days on the lawn without being eaten alive. I took the point, and announced we would be putting things out, but NO ONE was allowed in the garage. Someone offered to help us move for $20. I asked for the $20 in cash, and that toned them down. Then the carnage began.

“After the carnage…”

Pricing was capricious, and I know to round up a bit because buyers always say “will you take X dollars less?” Of course I will; I’m here to help Feldman move stuff out. He looks spiffy in his Washington wizards #48 Jersey, and he’s taped a rather professional looking sign on my long suffering magnolia tree. Feldman explains items while I run the bank for no reason other than I look like I run the bank. “Lite Brites” are popular sellers; a man with Cadillac logo tattooed on his head buys some stuff from the Red Chair Project, and a black man in an orange shirt piles stuff up, but doesn’t produce cash. I sense he’s a real pro. He pushes the price of a Frankenstein looking electronic device from $50 to $40, then tries a bold yet foolish move – “Will you take $20?” I pick it up and move it back to the no man’s land in the garage “Sorry, now its $60” “What? You said $40?” “Sorry, dude, no hard feelings, but until the cash is my hand…you just pushed too hard.” Ringtones fill the air; Feldman answers his phone “48 hour yard sale!” A woman offers a check – no dice, it takes 3 week s to figure a check is bad. But Feldman has some sort of iPhone iCheck cashing app, and the deal is done. The good stuff goes fast, leaving two inexplicable bowling balls.

“Vacuuming the driveway.”

12:01 am Saturday. Amazingly, there are 20 people picking through the tables in the dark, some using cell phone as flashlights. There’s a party atmosphere with vegan tacos and discussion ranging from politics to local theatre pricing. Dramtic lighting highlights the magnolia tree sign and buyers who saw posters at local eateries arrive. It’s getting cool, but the crickets are hanging on and the early breezy threat of rain subsides. But no one wants the bowling balls, even though they make great juggling props.

10:45 pm Saturday. Art can be lonely, especially when the bars open and the crowd diminished. Commissioner Bill Segal showed up, didn’t buy anything. Other artists dropped by, the solidarity was nice but cash would be nicer. Small items remain – commemorative cups, vintage soda pop, Alf dolls, and the bowling balls. Paper goods are getting soggy with dew, and sleep deprivation is taking its toll on conversation. I think the energy is spent, but 13 hours remain. Tomorrow’s assignment – find meaning in the chaos. Because there isn’t a unknown Picasso, I checked eBay.

11:00 am Sunday. The sun rises, as it always does, on the remnants of The Feldman Memorabilia Collection. Traffic after midnight was minimal, and the amount of stuff left to sell is dropping asymptotically, not linearly and there’s no question items will remain: The bowling balls. The Edward Scissorhands movie lobby standee. Cups and glasses that have almost no secondary or tertiary markets. Hebrew Homework. You could have guessed this, the bearded antique pickers with their piles and brutal Haitian bargainers and jogging soccer moms will buy this and that but not the others. We all have our obsessions and not all of our line up with Mr. Feldman’s. But he did move a ton off stuff, and somehow this was “Art.”

The 48 Hour Yard Sale” will continue until noon, Sunday February 5, 2012. Click here for directions. http://www.facebook.com/#!/profile.php?id=566470443</em>


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