Doug Bielmeier
Music For Billionaires
New Focus Recordings
I don’t spend much time hanging with billionaires, so I never hear the musical tastes of the ultra-rich. Rather, I stick to my thousandaire buddies, drink cheap beer, and complain about remixes. That may be best for all involved, as this collection of millionaire-themed music is rather… avant-garde.
I begin my journey with “Wells, M.E.” I’m not sure if that refers to the fancy rich-man’s enclave on the coast of Maine, or… something slightly evil? Help me judge here: the sound is a warbling mix of drones and fade-in rhythms. As I check out the music, I notice the stark mid-century artwork on the cover. It seems our billionaire class drives classic Cadillac cars from the 1960s, parked in one-car and rather plebeian carports, in rather plebeian tract homes. Interesting….
But on to the next track: “Corporate Responsibility Pledge.” There are no vocals, so it’s hard to say just how responsible anyone is here. But there is fine fiddle work and a tight rhythmic loop, and I do, in fact, feel slightly more responsible. I think I will recycle more, it’s the least I can do. We ARE all about minimalism here. “Burning Old Man Summer” flies up next. It’s a small, quiet composition with piano, violin, and minimalism. Is a billionaire minimalist? Maybe. Just maybe. “Throwaway Culture” offers a circus-like feel, you can hear the merry go round with small, repetitive notes that feel urgent but offer no forward momentum. Again, this may well be a quirk of the ultra-wealthy. I’d love to try it, but the IRS may object.
We are now nearly through our financial journey. “Widows Mite” and “Slow Dance 84” wander by, and we prepare to leave the amusement park with the farewell tune “CRP (East Coast Mix).” I have no idea what that might mean [*note, CRP = Corporate Responsibility Pledge], and I even asked my official live-in Maine guide (aka my wife) if she could decode. No luck there, but it was a nice little trip through Music for Billionaires. Perhaps they DO live differently in the fancy mansions of Down East.
