Wahr’s Mah Guns?

Wahr’s mah guns?

[Ed. Note: We recently received the following via e-mail, purporting to be a critique of our website. After some degree of confusion, we finally determined that the letter refers to James MacLaren’s June 1998 (!) review of Uncle Fester’s book, Vest Busters: How to Make Your Own Body-Armor-Piercing Bullets, and that the author took that single page as being our entire site. Much of the letter doesn’t make any sense, but we figured, hey, it’s worth a laugh — especially when we give James a chance to respond. It follows, unedited, for your amusement and edification. Remember, kids, it’s an election year, and idiots like this vote, too…]

What a waste of space. There is nothing here. At least fester’s info is available within other sites without basically being told to buy a fester book. Shit fester says in his last book to contact vest busters to get info on teflon coating a piece of equipment he is encouraging others to build. If this is just a fester site, why dont you just express a sign “Ha ha, I got you to waste more of your time my just not saying I’ll sale you another book. Shit there is very little in his books as it is, and most of it is free at free net sites.” Shit does he like now being a part of the shit system that sent him to the house before. With bussiness practices and greed like this he is gonna end up back in the house.

• •

James MacLaren replies: Well then, you cheap ass bastard, are you saying that Uncle Fester should be left to scrounge for scraps in the dumpster behind the McDonald’s while you save your pennies perusing the web and eschewing Fester’s worthy book? You’re a scavenging motherfucker, and as jackals the world over, begrudge the dead the flesh that you tear, even as you scan the neighborhood for approaching hyenas.

He’s giving a little something away, you philistine bastard. God, how can mercenary dorks like yourself persist in your self-serving ways, even as you attempt to steal as much as you can. This makes very little sense, but my take on it is that you are a parasite sucking on the good works of worthy folk that you can never aspire to rise to the level of.

Uh, yeah. He’s trying to make a buck. What’s YOUR deal, mister motherfucker? Do you live ENTIRELY without money? Who pays your rent? How did you get to be such a complete jerk?

Well really, now that I’ve seen it all, all I can ask you is to please put your head as far back up your ass as it was before you wrote this incredibly idiotic post. You don’t look very good with your head out in the open. Please, PLEASE, do, oh please, put that head of yours back up as deeply inside your ass as you can, OK?

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