Jed Simon

Jed Simon

Guitarist of Strapping Young Lad/Zimmer’s Hole

He’s a guitar player from Canada who loves KISS. I met him outside a Strapping Young Lad show, when they opened for Stuck Mojo and Testament. He was a nice guy. He’s got a band called Zimmer’s Hole, which is one of the most hilarious comic-voice metal bands you will ever hear. Loaded with toilet humor and general ridiculousness (and produced by Devin Towsend), they do a wonderful job of blurring the line between comedy and extremely serious metal (and yes, I do believe there IS a definite line). You’d expect a band that writes such stupid, adolescent songs as “Pork Rind Toes” and “Two-Headed Anal Baby” to suck, but the songwriting and overall technical abilities of this band are top notch, demanding hours of reverence from anyone who has a brain and uses it for having fun, or whatever.

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What the hell does Zimmer’s Hole mean?

The name Zimmer’s Hole actually refers to a friend’s asshole. He recently passed away, so we think it’s fitting that the name should live on in infamy — much like himself…

Whose toilet was that on the inside of the disc?

The toilet is from a studio in Spain that Devin was mixing at. No one was allowed to flush it, and the picture just belongs; don’t you think?

Who did which voices? Who’s the main singer? What kind of vitamins do they take?

The guy with the bone in his mouth (Dr. Heathen Hooch) is the lead singer. We all provide back-ups and various other “voices,” and I do the lead vocal during the KISS part in “Bred.” The only vitamins we take are green…

What’s with the three songs on the last track?

Everyone needs a bonus track, so we give ya three! You’ll also notice that the space between the last song and the first bonus song is 3:33… exactly halfway to hell. Are you scared yet?

How did Zimmer’s Hole meet?

A local club needed a band, and we said sure… except we had no band! We all knew each other already, so we just got together and wrote a set’s worth of songs in five days. Those songs are long gone, but it began us on the trail that’s led us here.

What does Zimmer’s Hole eat?

We eat meat — preferably Cajun blackened New York steak. No veggies here, my friend..

When was the first time Jed met DT, and what was that like?

The first time I met Dev, he pulled my pants down and made me feel super un-cool in front of my friends. I especially like it when he humps peoples’ legs…guaranteed laughs!

Who did those awesome vocals on the very last song? What is that person saying / screaming? That is the heaviest song I’ve heard in a long time!

Do you mean “Prick-Pipe?” That’s the Dr. singin’… he can do it all! That song didn’t come out the way we wanted, so we thought “bonus track” all the way…

Where do you get your ideas to do these songs? How do you go about writing the songs?

We get ideas from everywhere, man. The simplest thing can turn into inspiration. We also rehearse a hell of a lot — good things come from jamming. Mostly the songs are about friends of ours who have bumbled or floundered in some way.

How long did it take you to record that stuff?

It took about three days of recording, about a month of mixing and editing. That was a lot of work.

What’s the funniest thing that happened during the recording?

The funniest thing was watching my wife do the “you know honey..” part. Pure hilarity!

Aren’t you from Vancouver? What’s Vancouver like these days?

Yes. We are all from Vancouver and Vancouver is fine these days and thanks you for asking!

Who is doing that barbarian belch on the third song on the last track? Hilarious!

Once again, Dr. Heathen Hooch on vocals. You can also hear his vocals on almost every Devin recording (backgrounds). He is an amazing singer for such a FREAK!!!

What’s that like touring with SYL?

It is something you have to experience. It’s not too often you get chemistry between guys in a group. We have it in spades, and it is a genuine pleasure touring with these guys, who I consider my best friends.

How many practice days do you usually put in before the SYL tours?

Usually we put in about a month of solid daily practice before any tour, big or small.

Bullet Trains?

Hell yes! The only way to go in Japan. It’s like being in a plane that never takes off!

Sushi?

I hate the stuff but everyone else loves it. Fortunately for me, Japan also has the best steaks around; so I don’t mind watching them eat sushi!

Ever gotten in a fight at a SYL show?

New Jersey, 1997. The Testament tour. Bad club, idiot promoter, we weren’t even two songs in when a bouncer tackled one of the Testament crew. We dropped our instruments and pretty soon there were punches being thrown all over the place. Nasty, nasty show.

What do you think of the United States vs. Canada? Who’s gonna win?

Canada — because we have more room to hide!

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