Features

Top 19 Rock Star Quotes of 2001

Rock Stars Say the Darndest Things

2001 was a pretty great year for The Rock in every way, and I thought long and hard about what kind of Top 19 list I’d do: Top 19 Albums? Top 19 Most Rock Moments? Top 19 Live Shows? Top 19 Hot Rock Guys I Am Currently Sweating? Those were all good ideas and I could easily fill 19 slots on each list, but cold hard reality says those lists would require that I put a good deal of time and energy into coming up with clever stuff to say. And frankly, I need that time to Christmas shop. So, what I did was pull always fun, mostly exciting, and at times, deeply inspiring quotes from some of the ass-kicking interviews I’ve done over the past twelve months. In other words, someone else did most of the work for me. Most of these quotes didn’t go into any actual finished-published articles (in some cases, you will understand why immediately) so these are kind of exclusive. Please enjoy my Top 19 Rock Star Quotes of 2001 and just remember what Homer Simpson once said:

“Rock stars, is there anything they don’t know?”

“bh”

1) Billy Hopeless

“‘To thine own self be true,’ I think those were Shakespeare’s greatest words. I think that’s a good policy. You shouldn’t be friends with everybody in the world.”

– The lead singer of The Black Halos imparts some solid words of wisdom.

2) Eric Singer

“We had an incident – you know how they get lost in the basement trying to find the stage? – that happened to us in Atlantic City. I was in the cafeteria and I got lost coming up through the hallways [laughs]. I kept running into dead ends everywhere and I was just laughing at myself because I couldn’t find my way out of there. It was just totally Spinal Tap. I don’t know who advised Rob Reiner, but so many things in that movie were obviously based on real incidents.”

– Drummer superstar reveals his true-life Spinal Tap incident while touring with Alice Cooper.

3) Matt Cameron

“No, thank god! I sure as fuck hope not. I really like watching that show but I don’t want our band to be a part of that at all, ever.”

– Former Soundgarden drummer fields the question, “Will there ever be a Soundgarden Behind the Music?”

4) Rhett Miller

“Starting about 1994, we had every alt-country band in every town in America opening for us on tour and it gets really old, really fast. The vast majority of them are just doing a shtick and it’s not about the songs, so none of us never wear cowboy hats or boots or any kind of that shticky stuff. The twang that filters into our music is sort of through osmosis; having grown up in Texas. There was a conscious choice a long time ago that we would never really wear the trappings of the alt-country outfit, because I don’t think we ever thought of ourselves that way. We’re just a rock band.”

– Old 97’s vocalist responds to having the “Alt-Country” tag attached to his band.

5) Rikki Rockett

“At least the Latin thing has hit its peak; the Jennifer Lopez and Enrique Iglesias people. They have good songs and they do whatever they do, but it’s so Miami, so fucking… gay.”

– Poison’s drummer: honest to a fault.

6) Johnny Morgan

“Our first gig on this tour was playing in Austin after Billy Idol. If I said to people back home [in London] that we’d just done a gig with Billy Idol, they’d be laughing their heads off. Over here it’s like 2,000 people pumping their fists in the air and loving it. I actually really enjoyed it. He’s still got it going on.”

– The drummer for Moke knows it’s only rock & roll.

7) Captain Sensible

“I heard a funny thing, Mick Jagger was talking about David Bowie. He said, ‘Don’t let him know where you bought your new shoes.’ ‘Cause he steals everything, and he’ll be wearing them the next day. He’ll send some minion off to buy a pair. He steals all his ideas.”

– The Guitarist of The Damned on The Thin White Duke

“alice”

8) Alice Cooper

“My audience loves to see Britney get her head cut off.”

– King of shock rock on the pop songstress who ruined rock radio.

9) Andy Kubiszewski

“I didn’t actually have any surgery, that’s a myth that somehow made it onto our Web site. I don’t know where that came from, and all these people have been asking me on the road, ‘How was your surgery?’ And I’m like, ‘What is everybody talking about?’ I have no idea where that came from. We see so much on the road; you talk to so many people. Then the next week, on somebody’s Web site, there’s a new-flash about something. The Internet is just filled with misinformation, even your own authorized Web sites oftentimes are just filled with it. ‘Andy did not have surgery.’”

– Stabbing Westward’s drummer did not have any surgery, OK?

“buck”

10) Keith Nelson

“Well, we’ve already had guys arrested, we’ve had children out of wedlock, we’ve wrecked cars, we’ve bought Harleys, we’ve got tattooed. You know, we’ve pierced body parts, we’ve been written about on all the fuckin’ Web sites where they talk about guys’ cocks, we’ve got porn stars in the camp, we’ve got Playboy Bunnies, we’ve done every fucking cliche-dumb-rock thing that you can possibly do, we’ve done drugs… we’ve spilt more booze than some bands have drank and… what the fuck else do you have to do to be more rock? Die on stage, I guess. You know what? Fuck those guys.”

– Buckcherry’s guitarist responds to those who suggest his band needs to “Go farther” with their image.

“ct”

11) Bun E. Carlos

“The songwriter has had a resurgence in the past five or ten years. I don’t know if records are really getting sold because of it, but it seems that material is getting better and better all the time. When I think about what moves me, I think of those acoustic albums Dylan put out in the ’90s, like World Gone Wrong and As Good as I’ve Been to You. They’re chock full of songs that are 70 years old, and they’re all great, and real simple. If you listen to a Stones album from the ’60s or you listen to a Beatles album, the simpler songs and the ones with the less topical stuff on them age better, too. A well-written song lasts a long time.”

– Cheap Trick’s drummer on what kind of music moves him.

12) Tony Goddess

“Her producer/songwriter on every song is her husband, who’s this guy, ‘Mutt’ Lange. That, to me, is really interesting. I think that guy is pretty far out, so I thought her record would be worth a listen, regardless, because, wow, ‘Mutt’ Lange, weird. That’s the same guy who did Back In Black, you know? You listen to the album and there’s a lot of his signature dumb riffs all over the place.”

– Papas Fritas singer/guitarist on why he’s a fan of Shania Twain.

“jh”

13) Joe Henry

“Critics’ Darling is a really polite way of saying ‘This man does not sell any records to speak of.’”

– Critically acclaimed singer/songwriter – whose latest album Scar, seems to be on a LOT of critics’ Top Ten lists right about now – tells it like it is.

14) Eli Janney

“There’s a German [Reality TV show] called Yellow Cab, and basically what it is, there’s a house that the [contestants] all live in that they get kicked out of, but they have a job. Their job is to drive a Yellow Taxi, and they actually go out on the street and drive people around, like they’re a real taxi. And they have conversations, like, normal people get in and they’re like, ‘Oh my god, it’s the Yellow Taxi!’ They get in and talk to the person, which adds to the… whatever. I think they have to make a certain amount of money [to stay on the show]. Actually though, I don’t really like those shows.”

– Girls Against Boys’ keyboard player probably watches Survivor when no one is looking.

15) Hugo Ferrera

“My Mom went to see us the other day and I was like [to the crowd] ‘What the fuck’s goin’ on out there?!’ After the show my Mom’s like [imitating his Mom’s accent] ‘Hugo you said ‘Fuck’ like fourteen times!’ [Laughs] I was like ‘Sorry Mom.’ And she’s ‘You were drinking tequila on stage!’ ‘Sorry Mom.’ ‘You were smoking.’ ‘Sorry Mom.’ ‘You said ‘Fuck’!’ ‘Sorry Mom.’ ‘You squeezed that girl’s ass!’ ‘Sorry Mom.’ So, I’m still very close to my parents and I’ll always be their little baby, you know? It’s just really funny. In other cities I’m just like ‘Rock & Roll!’ and fucking crazy and partying and then I come home to Boston and I’m just like ‘Mom, can you make me my favorite sandwich?’”

– Tantric’s lead vocalist may be a Big Bad Rock Star, but he’s still Mom’s Little Boy

16) John Petkovic

“I believe that people should be judged based on their actions and not the psychology behind them.”

– *Cobra Verde’s most awesome singer/guitarist blows my mind.

17) Chip Z’Nuff

“I remember when we first signed with Atco Records and Derek Schulman said, ‘Don’t leave your house unless you look like a star.’ I remember him saying that to me, ‘Don’t walk out your front door without looking like a star. Even if it’s just your neighbors who see you, you better leave a mark so they don’t think you’re just a nine-to-five guy.’”

– Timeless Fashion Tips from the bassist/songwriter of Enuff Z’Nuff

18) Tommy Stewart

“I never really thought much of him as a drummer, but when I go back and I listen to some of their stuff – especially Sergeant Pepper – some of the stuff that he did on that record, it’s absolutely amazing. The drum part on that song, ‘Something,’ is incredible. I never would have thought of that, and I think it totally makes the song. That’s why, as a song-oriented drummer, I think he’s right in there. But when you think about Ringo Starr, you also think about a lot of other stuff. I mean, he was in The Beatles, the biggest band in the world. They invented everything.”

– Godsmack’s drummer thoughtfully answers the question, “What do you think of Ringo Starr as a drummer?”

“olp”

19) Raine Maida

“Oh, that was gross. In those types of experiences, I base everything back to the Naveed days, when we did a bunch of shows with Page & Plant. Robert Plant came up to us at dinner, sat down, ate with us and was just really complimentary and cared about our music. You know, he heard the song on the radio and that’s how we got the shows. When we were with The Stones…they don’t know who we are. We never met them. It was totally corporate, a drag.”

– According to Our Lady Peace’s lead singer, opening for The Rolling Stones was not as glamorous as one might expect.

* Note: John Petkovic quote is from an e-mail and not an actual interview. ◼


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