Music Reviews

Teeth of Lions Rule the Divine

Rampton

Southern Lord

Teeth of Lions Rule the Divine is a who’s who of evil, doom metal, including members from Sunn0))), Cathedral, Napalm Death, Khanate, Burning Witch, Iron Monkey, and Hard To Swallow. As you can expect, Rampton moves along at a snail’s pace, and is as thick and sludgy as the remaining funk on the bottom of a week old pot of coffee.

The album’s opening track is a 29-minute trek through hell and back; tribal drums are the only constant throughout, with very well delivered vocal rumblings being spit out every now and then. The guitars range from typically Khanate-ish feedback, to the occasional cool riff, slow and plodding, which beats the listener into sobbing submission. The track ends with over seven minutes of white fuzz, and the aural desolation which typically follows any Southern Lord band’s performance.

“New Pants and Shirt” is a quick seven-minute song that’s slow and brutal, and the vocalist sounds so evil and demented that I actually wondered if the lord of the underworld himself were singing. Yikes!

The album’s final track, “The Smiler,” sticks to the formula through most of the beginning of the song, but then turns curiously human after about six minutes through. Not to worry though, for the band actually cranks up some type of synthesizer, and the carnage ensues.

Rampton is not for the faint of heart; this is literally bowel crushing, low-end heavy, ultra slow metal. I wish I could see these guys live, because I can just imagine how destructive these low frequencies would be to my bowels (I’d wear a diaper, silly!) if I were in the same room with their amps. totally insane and evil stuff; proceed with the utmost caution.

Southern Lord Records: http://www.southernlord.com


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